079 – Thank you Ladies!

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THANK YOU LADIES!

Todays episode is going to be a little different in that, instead of talking exclusively about man stuff, I’m going to be talking about women.

I don’t have access to the exact demographics, but I know for a fact that more and more women are tuning in to this show.  I think that’s great, it’s fantastic, there’s room for everybody here.  However, it does make me curious.

lf So first I would like to ask a favor of the women who listen to this show.  Could you please go to the Contact Alf Tab and   and write me a letter…what I would like you to tell me is, why you listen to a show called being a better man…if you are a woman.

I’m really curious, because when I started the show I thought there might be a few women who listen in, trying to gain some insight into the male mind, but I think it has gone beyond that. 

I suspect there may be some single mothers of young boys who are looking for guidance, and I’m proud and happy to be a resource for you there. 

There might be some women who are single and are trying to figure out what a better man would be like?  There might also be some women in relationship who want validation that the guy lounging on their couch and eating their food is not actually being a better man.  I don’t know!  That’s why I’m asking.  So if you would drop me a line that would be great.

I’ve had a few women ask me if what I talk about on this show can apply to women…if it can apply to people in general.  Here’s what I think about that.

My gut reaction is that 90 or 95% of the stuff I talk about on this show and what my guests talk about is completely transferable and interchangeable between the genders.  I’m not sure about that other 5 to 10% though.

We are all humans after all, the primary difference being our hormonal ratio’s.  But…I also believe that men and women have some distinct differences, some of them caused by those hormonal ratios and I for one, am glad that we do have those differences, I celebrate them.

In general, women and men think differently, we act and react differently.  I know this because I am married to one, I was raised by one and my sister and daughters also happen to be women…I have seen the mysterious differences first hand, and I think to deny they exist is foolish.

Here’s the thing though…I don’t know, what I don’t know.  Having not been a woman myself I am not going to presume to understand all the subtle nuances that make them a woman.  I am humble enough, and smart enough to realize there are some things I just won’t get unless I have actually experienced it…being a woman is one of those things.

That’s why I focus specifically on being a better man…because I know what I’m talking about there.  I’ve been a man for a pretty long time, and I’m darn good at it.  I can speak with confidence about the experience of being a man and I know what it means.

So, for you ladies who wonder if the things I talk about here can apply to you equally…my answer is, that I have no idea.  It’s completely up to you, try it on and see if it fits.  If I say something that makes no sense to you at all, it might be one of those areas we are different in, and if that’s the case it can still be valuable because its always helpful to understand how the other side thinks.

The same is true for you guys out there.  I’ve heard so many guys complain about how women think and how they act.  Trust me…we are just as mysterious to them as they are to us at times.   Have you ever just listened…tried to put yourself in their shoes? 

I’m not saying you need to agree or adopt their opinion or anything like that.  I’m just suggesting that, as a man, if you are presented with the opportunity to listen to a woman, and hear the way she thinks, you should take that opportunity on in the role of a student.

Because even if it ultimately doesn’t make sense to you, just understanding the way the thought process flows and the motivations behind it, understanding the path in which conclusions are arrived at, can be infinitely helpful.  You might become some sort of ninja that understands women, who knows?

I have to try and do this all the time, because of the physical disparity between me and my wife.  I weigh around 270, she weighs around 125.  That’s a huge difference…we are really living in two different worlds and sometimes I have to try and imagine what it is like to be her.  At the same time, it’s helpful that she tries to understand what it’s like to be me.

That’s all it takes people, just a little bit of effort, a moment of consideration.  Instead of getting angry at your partner…try to understand them.

If you can make that a habit your life will get a little easier and you will be a better man, and woman, than you were yesterday.

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